Day 75

I can’t believe I’m already three quarters of the way through the 100 day challenge. Honestly, I almost feel guilty that it has been as easy as it’s been for me – especially after the first few troublesome weeks. I really and truly feel like over the past six months or so, I’ve just been SO ready to walk away from the ridiculousness that once I finally decided to do it, nothing could stop me.

I’d totally be lying if I said that I don’t have pangs of longing for my dear friend chardonnay anymore. Of course I do! I love the feel of those first couple of sips – warm, glowing, happy. But somewhere along the way, it turns into a complete shit show where I’m swigging back three, four, five, six glasses – getting sloppy – getting overly emotional – and making bad decisions. Seriously, my off switch is busted. So I have to walk away from the booze.

Tomorrow is kind of a big deal for me. At work, we have an annual vendor show for our customers, and tomorrow is the show. It’s my biggest project of the year – I start the planning in the spring for this thing, and we have over 50 vendors coming in, setting up their displays, and hopefully selling a ton of product to our customers. I’m excited, nervous, and busy as hell. The show always culminates with everyone hitting the bar after a successful event, and basically getting plastered. This will be interesting, as I’m always in the center of the celebration, as this is MY event. Not too many people at work know that I’m no longer drinking, so I’m sure there will be a ton of explaining to do. And I’m trying to figure out what I should say. Part of me wants to just tell everyone “Hey, you all have seen me at my worst – obviously, alcohol is NOT a toy for me.” And then another part of me wants to just disappear and not have to deal with it. I guess I’ll just see how it goes.

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7 thoughts on “Day 75

  1. YAY!!!! this is mind-blowing amazing spectacular!!!! I am so proud of you!! and seriously when those peeps start asking (wonder if they will even notice over there drunken selves) you make sure you stand up tall and smile.. no need to give any one details.. unless your ready to scream it from the tops of the mountains.. WOW! you inspire me…
    xo
    Lex ;))))

  2. Congratulations and good luck tomorrow! I agree with AuntieLex that you don’t need to share more than you’re comfortable with. When you’re in the moment, you’ll decide instinctively what to say, whether it’s a simple “ahh, not tonight” or a deeper response. Cheers!

  3. Yiiipeeeee!!!! Look at you go! Just be your fabulous self and bask in the results of all your hard work. I’m totally with Lex on this one, no need to disclose anything if you don’t want to. Have a great day!!!!!!

  4. Yeah there’s that magical point between glasses 2 and 3 where the lightness and fun of alcohol turns into grim determination… best to just not touch the stuff.. you will keep adjusting to beign sober to the point where you don’t hanker after the stuff any more.. promise. Doing great! congrats on 75 days! What a beautiful number xxx

    • Thank you, Mrs D:-). Yeah, I could never maintain that magic feeling, because I’m an addict, aNd I always want moremoremore. It is really nice to finally be figuring out that more isn’t always better. I actually find socializing sober to be enjoyable – finally! Sometimes it’s easier and more fun than other times, but wow – the whole no regrets thing really kicks ass!

  5. Terrific and inspiring.

    Stay strong.

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